What If Your Hero Won't Put Out?

It's Wylde Wednesday here with the Text Divas where we text about the spicier things between the sheets! So, pull up a chair and a Pomegranate-Tini in the stripper boot glass (a favorite of mine) and let it all hang out. There are Godivas for your pleasure while we enjoy a moment of silence to watch the parade of our hunky heroes in their broad-shouldered goodness on their way to work. Watching them step into the pages makes me wonder, what happens when they don't do their jobs? If they want to take a sick day? You can't call in to Cupid, not when your job is true love and certainly not when it comes to the baloney pony horse show where he is the star attraction.

What happens if the hero won't put out? I know ladies, when it happens to you, it's almost like you want to ask the universe, "Did this just happen to me? Am I here right now?" Yes, you are. It really happened. Feel free to insert indigant gasps. At least it's heavy breathing.

Sometimes our heroes get their jocks in a knot, sometimes there are other issues that must be resolved before they'll put on the saddle. Also, it should be noted that while shining armor is an ideal, or even slighlty tarnished armor for our tasty anti-heroes, it has been known to chafe. Being mad at him doesn't help. Neither does throwing things. So what do you do?

Why, seduce him of course. Just like you would any other red-blooded alpha male. In fact, the more reluctant the better. It can help add tension to the scene. Your heroine's actions can be intentional, or that innocent sway of her hips, the lushness of her mouth, or even a physical proximity caused by some unforseen necessity.

But like in real life, our hero can't have it so easily. Not when we had to work so hard to get him where we want him. Oh, no. After you get him going, our dear heroine needs to wash her hair, get her head stuck in the microwave or clip coupons for her bomb shelter stash of Monistat. Or the sky falls, you know, anything to make it impossible for them to do what it was you wanted to begin with.

Sure, it will be a little frustrating for you if your hero's a snatch tease, but dangle it in front of his nose and he'll be begging to put out. You just have to open his eyes and that taunting button-fly to everything he never knew he wanted.

If he still won't put out, well, then you have bigger issues and need to re-examine where you are in the story and if that connection between them is missing.

I'm always the first one in the check out line to take the purple-headed womb ferret out for a walk, but it needs to be a plot device. Sex has to further the story. In my current WIP, there is some demon rodeo action right from the start. Does it further their relationship? No, but it establishes it. It's the part of the plot where the smutty Mephistophelean contract comes in. Sex for the sake of sex is boring. At least when we're talking romance. I will confess to skipping over some sex scenes if I haven't made that connection or felt the tension between the hero and heroine.

If your hero won't put out and you've tried the seduction and he's still being stubborn, the sex isn't the problem. It's somewhere else in your book. Listen to what Hunk-a-licious has to say, he won't steer you wrong. He's your hero after all. Let him save the day!